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Topic

I'm annoyed at my friends who can't report back to me.

Problem / Need advice
#1
  • Makiki
  • 2021/07/12 19:20

She is a relatively new friend whom I met after moving to Hawaii, but whenever I have a question （ I want to ask her, such as how to write in English or how to do something ）, she asks me a lot of questions at all hours. I try to help her by texting her questions, but she never reads my questions about her specialty. When I helped her with school procedures for her relatives, it took a long time for no reason even though I asked for a report on the results.

I understand that I am an idiot for responding so earnestly, and I know I shouldn't have high expectations, but I feel like I'm not doing enough. I don't think I'm doing anything to make people hate me, but I'm feeling ashamed that I'm being taken advantage of. I would like to know if you have had similar experiences and still continue to be friends ？ I would like to know how to casually keep my distance from them even if they ask me questions.

This text has been translated by auto-translation. There may be a slight difference between the original text and the translation. (Original Language: 日本語)

#2
  • Shin
  • 2021/07/13 (Tue) 08:27
  • Report

Hawaii There are people like that.
I once asked a question and when I answered it, she didn't read it.
After that, I went out with him for a while, but he was a selfish person, so I said goodbye to him.
Unless you are in the position of being indebted to that person,
you should not only casually keep your distance, but also point out their bad points thoroughly until you feel relieved.
If they don't try to change, that's the extent of their character.
Let's isolate. That is the most refreshing way to do it. lol
And it will be good for that person.
If you eliminate from one end to the other the things that torment you, you will surely have a good life.

This text has been translated by auto-translation. There may be a slight difference between the original text and the translation. (Original Language: 日本語)

#3
  • Stoker
  • 2021/07/16 (Fri) 16:30
  • Report

Selfish people are usually the ones who suffer from mental illness.
（ Asperger's syndrome, etc. ）
This is the person's inability to understand the mood of the place and the basic rules of social existence.
（ Let's take it as a brain disease ） [I can't figure it out normally]
It's natural to be stressed out and keep your distance.

This text has been translated by auto-translation. There may be a slight difference between the original text and the translation. (Original Language: 日本語)

#4

Shin
Thanks for the advice. It was refreshing to hear your refreshing approach. I can see that you are a very quick thinker, and I am sure that you have many more moments of astonishment in your daily life than I do, but it is reassuring to know that you know how to make good life choices.

This text has been translated by auto-translation. There may be a slight difference between the original text and the translation. (Original Language: 日本語)

#5

Stoker
Thanks for your input. That's a good way to look at it, and it helps me to keep a level head too. My friend is certainly too self-deprecating and sometimes I feel she is panicking. I will try not to look directly at them and pass them by with a narrow eye.

This text has been translated by auto-translation. There may be a slight difference between the original text and the translation. (Original Language: 日本語)

#6
  • フェードアウト
  • mail
  • 2021/07/16 (Fri) 22:01
  • Report

When asked a question, I would purposely leave time to delay my reply. If it were me, I would reply after a week. If you keep replying leisurely, they'll give up. If they really have a problem, they'll look it up on the internet or find someone else on their own, so it's okay to leave it alone.

Also, if he asks you out for dinner or something, just say no, that you're busy, and don't make any further contact with him. You may be lucky to find out his/her self-centeredness quickly while you still can.

This text has been translated by auto-translation. There may be a slight difference between the original text and the translation. (Original Language: 日本語)

#7

How to keep your distance⁉️ I think you know the answer yourself.
I can only follow your advice. I am afraid that maybe I will lose one friend ？ Friends are not about the number of friends, but about humanity, and if you go out with someone, you and your partner will be happy ♪ I hope you will take this opportunity to grow as an adult woman.

This text has been translated by auto-translation. There may be a slight difference between the original text and the translation. (Original Language: 日本語)

#8

Fadeout
Thanks for your very practical input. I will try to do something about my habit of responding immediately. I will do my best to change the course to a fair relationship before it becomes like a rotten relationship.

This text has been translated by auto-translation. There may be a slight difference between the original text and the translation. (Original Language: 日本語)

#9
  • ハワイ
  • 2021/07/17 (Sat) 14:17
  • Report

There are so many of them in the Vivinavi community.

Ignore them.

Posting about Japanese TV and posting about railroads is
an act of revenge.

There are a lot of restrictions in Covid19, and as an outlet, they are here to
sabotage Japanese TV, and the railroads have nothing
to do with them, they are just taking it out on them.

This text has been translated by auto-translation. There may be a slight difference between the original text and the translation. (Original Language: 日本語)

#11

Hawaii
Thank you for your comment. Yes, I agree. Ignoring is the best.

This text has been translated by auto-translation. There may be a slight difference between the original text and the translation. (Original Language: 日本語)

#11

Lee
Thank you for your comment.
I commented without logging in, so my reply was not reflected and I apologize for making you feel uncomfortable.

This text has been translated by auto-translation. There may be a slight difference between the original text and the translation. (Original Language: 日本語)

#13

Rainbow
Thank you for your comments. Thanks to your advice, I was able to clear my mind. As for my friend here, we met through the introduction of someone who has been a great help to me, and I had hoped to build a good relationship with her if possible, but since we are not going to cut ties, I would like to maintain moderation in our relationship.

This text has been translated by auto-translation. There may be a slight difference between the original text and the translation. (Original Language: 日本語)

#14
  • リー
  • 2021/07/19 (Mon) 12:07
  • Report

Makiki
I commented without looking at your reply properly. My apologies.

This text has been translated by auto-translation. There may be a slight difference between the original text and the translation. (Original Language: 日本語)

#15

Lee
Thank you for your kind comments.

This text has been translated by auto-translation. There may be a slight difference between the original text and the translation. (Original Language: 日本語)

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